Therapist Blog

3 Steps To Healing Emotional Wounds – Part One

Dan  Farish, Drug and Alcohol Counselor, Washington, 98249

“The wound is the place where the Light enters you.”
- Rumi

“All healing is first a healing of the heart.”
- Carl Townsend

We have all suffered emotional wounds caused by some form of trauma, be it physical, sexual, or verbal abuse. These wounds have caused many of us to shut down on some levels. Too many of us have built a wall of protection around our hearts to keep the bad guys out, but have inadvertently become prisoners of those same walls. Spiritual dis-ease is the result, which manifests itself through addiction, anxiety, depression, loneliness, and a long list of other emotional disorders.

What is spiritual dis-ease? Well, the disorders mentioned above are really just symptoms of spiritual dis-ease and not the source of the problem.The most accurate description of spiritual dis-ease is a blockage of love, both to us and from us. It is a separation between our soul (our essence) and a very real energy called universal love. Common sense suggests that a spiritual problem requires a spiritual solution. The good news is that we all have the ability to heal emotional wounds through spiritual healing.

3 Steps To Healing Emotional Wounds – Part One

Here are 3 simple solutions you can use to heal those nagging wounds of the past and move forward in a happy, positive direction.

1. Recognize Your Own Wounds. We are all exposed to some degree of emotional, physical or psychological trauma at some point of our lives. These experiences remain firmly planted in the back of our minds, no matter how hard we try to forget them. Many of us try to ignore the pain or even self-medicate to escape it, hoping that it will disappear one day, but that is simply not the case.
Past abuse and other trauma issues will always find a way to surface in our lives, often in the late teenage or early adult years. Depression, anxiety, unhealthy relationships, overeating, substance abuse and many other abnormal behaviors are simply symptoms of deeper issues and result from spiritual dis-ease, which describes the condition more accurately than the word disease, which suggests these issues are of a physical nature. When we experience spiritual dis-ease, we feel detached from others, the world around us, and even from ourselves. We feel empty, detached and alone inside.
Imagine our wounds as an old wooden chest we’ve stored in the attic of our mind. The chest is filled with painful memories we’ve been collecting since early childhood. We know we need to throw away the bad junk in the trunk, but the attic is a dark, scary place to visit alone and we don’t like to go there.
The good news is you don’t have to go into the attic at all. It’s enough to recognize that the wounds exist and that they can be completely healed.

2. Recognize Others’ Wounds. There are people that behave badly, but there are no bad babies. Emotional wounds are contagious and are passed from one person to another. For example, dysfunctional parents commonly carry wounds inflicted in them by their own dysfunctional parents. In other cases, it might be a total stranger that inflicts pain on unsuspecting victims or a child might become the target of neighborhood bullies. The people that hurt us are to be understood, rather than judged. It’s important to know that bullies and other predators aren’t born that way, They, too, have become emotionally wounded by others and simply have not yet experienced a spiritual healing. It would be fantastic, of course, if all the walking wounded would read these words and decide to overcome their own issues. But, that is their choice to make and they will have to deal with the consequences of their choices. You, however, can choose to break the chain, rather than become a part of it. Viewing those that have hurt you as victims, rather than “bad seeds”, will help you begin to heal your own wounds.

3. Commitment to healing. Nobody likes to see the bad guys beat the good guys. You have every right to feel angry and betrayed when someone you love and trust hurts you. You also have the ability to channel that anger into determination to break free of the past by refusing to be held prisoner by the pain others have caused you. No one has the power to ruin our happiness unless we give it to him or her. We were born to enjoy happy, peaceful, content lives, despite the challenges we all face along the way. Adopt a “refuse to lose” philosophy and remain focused on overcoming all difficulties that present themselves. This is called resilience and it’s one of the finest qualities we possess as humans.

In 3 Steps To Healing Emotional Wounds – Part Two, we’ll discuss how to connect with your inner self and ways to open your inner self to spiritual healing. It’s not nearly as difficult or scary as it might seem and fortune favors the brave, as some dead guy once said.

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