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What to Do About Your Little Boy Husband
By Matt W. Sandford, LMHCI don’t mean to stereotype (too much), but do you think that husbands or boyfriends come in &l...
Feeling Behind in Life: The Myth of the Self Made Man(Person)
By Matt W. Sandford, LMHCI often talk with people who are struggling because they feel that they are behind in life in some w...
Sexual Trauma and Men - A Path to Thriving
Talking about sexual assault, sexual abuse, and rape is difficult for anyone. For men, it has it’s own unique challenge...
3 Ways to Tackle Anxiety
Matt W. Sandford, LMHC Everyone worries, but not everyone worries the same way. Everyone worries but not everyone is affecte...
Depression and Hypnotherapy
An ever increasing number of people suffer from depression in 2014. Generally, doctors believe that depression is mostly biol...
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Parents teach their children emotional intelligence by being attuned to a child’s needs and feelings. Feeling seen and understood, children develop a sense of themselves as worthy, valuable individuals. They learn to accept and handle their feelings as well as to be sensitive to others’ emotions.
How do we as parents help children develop these emotional skills? First we shift our perception, slow down from our adult busy-ness, set aside our parental desires about how our children might be, and step out of an orientation to our own needs and judgments in a situation, so that we can see our children for themselves and focus on understanding what they need and how they feel beneath their behavior.
The mere act of accurately and compassionately labeling an emotion is tremendously powerful- it grounds the child, helps him feel emotionally held and contained, conveys the acceptability, understandability and therefore manageability of feelings, and preserves his integrated sens...
As a hypnotherapist, I have been infuenced by my studies in psychology and counseling in my approach to the client-therapist relationship. Carl Rogers believed that a therapist who demonstrated positive, unconditional acceptance and regard of the client, expressed empathy and active listening, and who was unafraid to show himself as a fallible human being, laid the groundwork for a fulfilling and ultimately a healing relationship.
Like Carl Rogers, I do not set myself up as the expert in the field of my client's wellbeing. i am simply the guide towards my client's subconscious, which some say is the home of the best as well as the scariest, emotional and spiritual material. For the most part, I prefer to focus on helping the client to bring to the surface the most empowering subconscious material in order to make it manifest in his or her daily life. Sometimes, the subconscious guides us to an event or an emotional feeling from childhood, where we will try to identify and alleviate th...
I was recently reading a blog in which the author – a mother of a young boy – was bragging that her son is “all boy” – meaning he is rough and tumble and plays with trucks, guns, and GI Joes. I found this offensive. What about the boys who like Barbies and arts and crafts are sensitive? Are they not complete boys? Are they somehow deficient? Would she be less pleased with him. It seems strange to me that we are still playing into gender stereotypes about masculinity in men and boys.
This creates potential problems for anyone who identities as male. The trans man has to figure out and come to terms with what his masculinity looks like. The gay 16 year old who likes drag has to accept that he can be feminine and still be a man. The straight man who holds his feelings in hears from his wife that he is emotionally distant, while he’s simply trying to be the “strong one”. It even makes life difficult for people who identify as straight female...
Have you ever taken a yoga class? If so, then you are surely aware of one of the most basic poses – Child’s Pose. When taking this pose, you are folded over your knees, forehead of the ground and arms and hands either flat by your sides or stretched out in front of you. I understand it to be a resting pose – used when you need to take a break from the current flow of the class. You might be too tired, you might have noticed a pain somewhere in your body, you might simply not want to do the current pose that the rest of the class is doing. So you opt out and take Child’s Pose.
Child’s Pose is a legitimate asana – or body position. Every yoga teacher I know speaks of Child’s Pose as a fantastic option. They often will direct me and my other classmates to ‘take Child’s Pose.’ But they also point out that this position is not a sign of weakness, but a sign of strength, intuition, and self-care. Knowing when you’ve pushed yo...
Breakthrough in Holistic Medicine... the Emotion Code. Probably you never heard of this method of Healing, but now you will be able to learn or even use for your own benefit.
Would you like to be Free of your Neck Pain, Back Pain, Leg Pain, Headaches, Shoulder Pain, even Teeth Pain or any other Acute and Chronic Pain ? or to clear Your Anxiety, Fear, Anger, Phobias, Depression, Grief, Shame, Abuse, Worry, etc.
Trapped Emotions are the biggest underlying cause of all diseases and Pain.
Works for Animals Children and anybody who suffer from Pain or illness.
Just experience this Breakthrough Holistic approach to your pain and see the result for yourself .
Release a few Trapped Negative Emotions ... Your Pain is either reducted or completely GONE ! It takes 1/2 hr, or less time to do that. This is done by Muscle Testing, and it is 100 % accurate.Muscle Testing is the door to the Subconcious Mind where all informations are stored. The Subconcious Mind is the Devine Intelligence. W...
These past few months I have been contemplating my rootedness in life and how it has served or hindered me over the years. I also have seen this question arise in my clients’ work over the years and I know that there are blessings as well as some traps in being deeply and soundly rooted in the past.Years back, when going through my psychotherapy training I was asked to look back, not only on my own life but also those of the people who came before me: my parents, grandparents, and great-grandparents. It was an enlightening exercise as it showed me how much of who I am was based on their life experiences, fears, hopes, joys, and pains (I recommend the exercise for anyone who is interested in finding out more about what ‘makes them tick’, as they say). And because of my own interest and leanings I also have looked deeply into my lives before this life, my past incarnations as much as I can remember them. I have come to realize that I — like everyone on this planet...
Adolescents’ reaction to the news of divorce could be anywhere within the spectrum of intense anger, sadness, and depression to no reaction at all. Adolescents who express their feelings accuse their parents of “ruining their life”, “ being selfish” and “ inconsiderate”. They may also act up as being the “victims of their parents’ decision”. As a result, their grades at school may drop, they may start missing classes, refuse to go to school, and hang out with the troublesome kids at school and justify their behavior as the consequence of the parents’ separation.
On the other end, adolescents who do not show any feelings may seem to be taking the news of the divorce very well; nothing changes in their behavior or school grades and they continue to be the same. However, every teen will react to the separation in some explicit way; although it may take them days or even months. Parents need to be prepared for a backlash an...
Dr. Ronald Riggio, psychologist and professor at Claremont McKenna College, discusses the connection between smells and childhood memories in Psychology Today. Why is it that certain smells trigger certain memories, even from an early age? It is part of our evolutionary survival skills. Think about it…you know when you smell expired milk you should not put it on your Cheerios at breakfast. Have you ever taken a deliberate sniff your sweetie’s tee shirt to comfort you when he is out of town. A scent of a loved one makes a person feel safe and reassured. This is because the amygdala (the brain’s emotion center) & the hippocampus (a place that helps store memories) is located close to the brain’s olfactory bulb (Riggio, 2012).
During a recent snowstorm in Atlanta, my husband and I watched the fat snowflakes come down in the light of our front porch light drinking a mug of hot cocoa with obligatory mini-marshmallows. The smell of the hot chocolate made me thin...
In a recent Washington Post column a woman having trouble with conception finds herself jealous of a friend’s pregnancy announcement. The advice given in the column sounds simple, but is there a tried and true way to stay positive in the face of infertility? The simple answer is “no”. However, there are many ways to stay sane in this life crisis. By acknowledging and processing the emotions and developing coping skills while also getting adequate help you can keep the rest of your life from getting swallowed by the abyss of infertility.
First of all, it is possible to have intense sadness for yourself while being truly happy for a pregnant friend. These two emotions can exist together but be extremely confusing. After congratulations are given, in a non-public arena be honest with your friend about your torn feelings. If you just start avoiding or isolating yourself with no explanation, your friendship is sure to suffer. Simple and private is best, such as “Whi...
For many transgender people, particularly those who identify on the gender binary, “passing” is of particular importance. And this makes a lot of sense to me. I understand the very real concerns about people on the streets, at the job, or in a restroom recognizing you as transgender. There can be powerful, negative repercussions when that happens. Unfortunately, we see this all the time and even have an annual day of mourning to those whose lives are lost due to the fear and hatred of others. However, I have seen in my work that passing also comes with some troubles.
I have met quite a few trans folk who “pass” very well. No one knows about their natal sex or assigned gender. And these folk integrate quite well into the cisgender world. In fact, some integrate so well, that very few people know about their transition or their life story. And this is where the trouble sometimes lies.
When know one knows about your transgender identity, who do you talk to about th...
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