Therapist Relationship Category

Cali Estes, The Addictions Coach Interviewed on

How One Person Can Change The World.” Interview series with Stanley Bronstein on

Cali Estes, Founder of The Addictions Coach and The Addictions Academy was Stan’s guest on Tuesday, to talk about how she is shaking up the addictions recovery field. In the interview, Cali discusses what motivated her early on, and confesses that the addictions field was not where she saw herself working. (Hint: Think more along the lines of Clarice Starling in Silence of The Lambs).

Cali talks about her approach with clients as a combination of psychotherapy and coaching. Essentially, determine the root cause of the problem, process it, and then move on. Cali doesn’t dwell on the past with her clients, rather focuses on the present actions they need to take to change the behavior. Therapy shouldn’t take years to see a behavior change according to Cali, and actually tells her clients to “Fi...

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Asked & Answered: Read Therapy Tips from the TherapyTribe Professional Therapist Community.


Have you ever wondered if you need therapy and how to select the "right" therapist for you?

Or, what should you expect from therapy, what happens in therapy, and how does it work? 

We reached out to the TherapyTribe therapist community to answer some common questions many have when considering therapy. Our therapist's provided insight from a variety of backgrounds, credentials and their years of experience treating patients. We interviewed 19 mental health professionals and asked them to answer these three questions:

1) What should a patient look for in a therapist?
2) What is one mistake most patients make with their therapist/therapy?
3) What is one myth in regards to therapy or treatment that you would like to bust?
Read what our therapists had to say >

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What is Insight-Oriented Psychotherapy?

Every once in awhile I am asked how my style of therapy helps people, so I decided to write this short post to explain my chosen method of helping people. Insight-Oriented therapy is a briefer form of psychoanalysis which was first conceived of by Sigmund Freud. It is a psychodynamic therapy that is centered around the idea that there are maladaptive cognitive processes in place and that those processes are for the most part unconscious.

The cure lies in making those processes conscious through free association and interpretation. As an insight-oriented therapist my aim is to help you think differently. The first step in my work with people is to support them by treating the discomfort they are feeling and then through a gradual process we uncover the mechanisms that prevent change. Then we develop and build strategies together to create lasting change.

My approach to the work is based on the relationship we create together in the room. We use that relationship to inform you how you ...

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Journey Through Therapy - The Ups and Downs

Have you ever had one of those amazing realizations that are earth shattering and sure to change your life forever — only to find that a few days later things are right back to where they were before? Or have you noticed that sometimes after the week from hell life suddenly seems to shift and everything gets easier? If yes, you come well prepared for the emotional journey that can be psychotherapy.

For most people, making the decision to see a psychotherapist is a difficult one. We have learned that we should be strong enough to deal with our feelings and emotions ourselves. Going out and looking for help seems like a sign of weakness. We also have been taught to keep family issues to ourselves and to not speak ill of the dead and those close to us, at least not to strangers. And if none of those outer rules deter us from going into therapy, the fear of drudging up the past, opening old wounds, and dealing with the shadows of our personalities are just enough to make us turn aro...

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Why You Should NOT Write Online Reviews of Therapists

Have you ever considered writing a review about a therapist?  I encourage you NOT to do so.  

Here's why:

Many of us rely on information we can glean from the internet.  Very often, I find electricians, plumbers, car repair services, etc. by checking out the business's online reviews.

There are even review sites for MD's and psychotherapists.

But should you use them?  Should you write a review yourself?

Whether you've had a great or a terrible experience, it's very tempting to write a review of a health care provider.  After all, you'd tell people what you thought about a restaurant, right?

So why wouldn't you?

One huge reason:  It risks your confidentiality in ways you might not predict.  For example, while you may only have a "user name," what happens if your reviewer profile has a picture?  Or, if you do enough reviews, someone who could figure out who you are from another review would know who you are when you cover a health/mental heal...

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Should I Be Concerned If My Therapist Sees A Therapist?

[From the Downtown Therapy blog]


Short answer: no.

Long answer… If you don’t feel that seeing a therapist yourself (or therapy itself) is bad, then why should it be concerning if your therapist chooses to see someone? Many therapists see their own therapist, and it shouldn’t be surprising. After all, therapists are tasked with working with a wide array of potential concerns from an even wider array of individuals and couples. That’s a lot of emotion and anger, and anxiety to contend with; depending upon what’s going on in that therapist’s life sometimes the therapist-as-therapist and the therapist-as-private-individual divide can become difficult to delineate.

A rough metaphor would be working with a fitness trainer and then one day coming into the gym and seeing your trainer privately working out, perhaps even struggling with her regimen in a way that is proportionate to your own.

This concern speaks to an expectation in some quarters t...

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My Friend Needs A Therapist - Will You Contact Them?

Short answer: I can’t.

Longer answer: this question has been asked many times and in various forms (exchange “friend” for “wife”, “husband”, “child”), and each time I’ve been unable to accommodate the request. Why? Part of seeing a therapist is the idea of will and choice – the will to investigate something which we feel is bothering us, and the choice of whom to see for this service. If I were to go ahead and contact someone at the behest of a friend or relative, I would be imposing myself upon that choice and that will (symbolically at least).

Even if someone I contacted ended up never-minding my intrusion (and their friend’s intervention) and became a regular client, that initial lack of choice and will would probably linger in the therapeutic space. It could prove disruptive to the extreme, especially as they become more and more attuned to their situation.

So, no, sadly I cannot contact your friend, no matt...

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Should I See A Male Or Female Therapist?

(From the Downtown Therapy blog. Check it out to see more)

I was recently preparing a presentation for men who are training to become registered massage therapists – men being, until recently, a minority in a profession largely staffed by women. The idea was to discuss societal gender stigmas and the myths which arise from them (one, for example, being that “men are better at deep tissue massage than women” – not true).

Here are my thoughts on the matter, when it comes to choosing a psychotherapist:

First: There are always going to be personal preferences. Given the potentially long-term and intimate nature of the profession, if a client seeking a psychotherapist prefers the company of a man or a woman to seek help from, whatever that selection is based on is not mine to judge. From where I stand, for anyone seeking help, the freedom of having that choice is sacred. For some clients, being able to to make that choice is an important first step.

Second: Ther...

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I have 2 jobs and in both jobs I am contracted to keep secrets, the purpose of this secret keeping is to protect those I work for.

The question that occurred to me when reflecting on this is about the nature of secrets, what are their benefits and drawbacks? I stated at the beginning of this that in my professional life they protect those I work for, though this is not the entire story. They also serve to provide a safe and trusting environment for those I work for, enabling them to be open and speak freely without having to worry that anything they say would go outside of those four walls. It is rather ironic to my mind that they are such a powerful enabler in that situation yet in many others they can be destructive, burdensome and be a catalyst or cause of distrust.

Within relationships with loved ones we are often taught that we should be open and honest and not keep secrets, yet in so many instances secrets are kept in order to not hurt peoples feelings or protect people, yet if...

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How do I choose a counselor?

How do I choose a counselor anyway?
After completing multiple profiles to promote my unique and growing counseling practice, I have become increasingly aware that all therapists are not a good fit for all people. In today’s world, we have the internet at our fingertips, and we can research any professional we are considering working with. This includes doctors, lawyers, teachers, and yes, counselors.
So, what are you looking for in a counselor? Usually this is not something we sit back and consider, as we often start looking for a therapist or counselor during a stressful time or crisis. So we don’t often consider this when things are going smoothly in our lives....

If we are in crisis, we may be hoping to find someone quickly. Concerns that should always be considered: Is the counselor.....

1. Licensed and in good standing
2. Experienced in issues relating to your problem
3. Affordable or reasonably priced

Licensed and in Good Standing?
Counselors credentials can be verified...

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