Therapist Relationship Category
The Great Questionnaire
As I have noted before, NC, the home of my youth is a weird place. It’s a place I love–the place I belong. But, it’s strange nonetheless. For instance, I have yet to understand the rabid, yet tender romance between NC, hipsters and craft beer. I’m a martini girl myself. And no, I don’t consider a beer that was probably made in someone’s backyard and named after a book that neither you nor I have read as a good substitute. I don’t care if it has notes of pumpkin, bread or (as an earnest, bespeckled young man told me with much gravitas last week) goat. But to be fair, I have always thought that beer tastes in general like goat. So kudos to him for cornering that market.
A fascinating aspect of my practice here is the tendency for new clients to send me questionnaires as a sort of job interview before getting together for the first time. I think this is, in short, fantastic. I have often railed about the responsibility therapists have for being c...
Why Do I Pick The Same Guy?
Recently, I heard of a woman complain that she kept running into the same type of man. She went on saying that each time she goes out looking for the “right” type of man she is often disappointed that she only finds the ones that treat her poorly. Is this you? Do you seem to struggle with the same issue? Are you ready for a relationship that is worthy of your time and energy? Then it is time to stop this cycle and get into the relationships that you desire!
The truth is many of our relationships reflect how we feel internally. For example, if you often experience poor self esteem, you will find relationships where you need constant encouragement to feel good about yourself. Another example is that a person who struggles with insecurity will often chose a person who has a problem with being faithful and has several infidelity issues. The important point to remember is that for you to find the “good” relationship you seek, you may want to consider resol...
Should I See A Male Or Female Therapist?
(From the Downtown Therapy blog. Check it out to see more)
I was recently preparing a presentation for men who are training to become registered massage therapists – men being, until recently, a minority in a profession largely staffed by women. The idea was to discuss societal gender stigmas and the myths which arise from them (one, for example, being that “men are better at deep tissue massage than women” – not true).
Here are my thoughts on the matter, when it comes to choosing a psychotherapist:
First: There are always going to be personal preferences. Given the potentially long-term and intimate nature of the profession, if a client seeking a psychotherapist prefers the company of a man or a woman to seek help from, whatever that selection is based on is not mine to judge. From where I stand, for anyone seeking help, the freedom of having that choice is sacred. For some clients, being able to to make that choice is an important first step.
Seco...
Counseling Relationship- Part 2
I wanted to continue forward with a set of blogs I am posting. The counseling relationship is very important in helping you as a client to move through the issues that you are bringing to your counselor. As a counselor I would encourage you as a client to be honest with their counselor. I understand, as do most counselors, that at the beginning of counseling you as the client are trying to figure out if you get along with the counselor and if they will be the person you chose to walk along your path with you. It is a great process for the client to learn about the counselor as well as themselves, and it may make the therapeutic relationship even stronger. I know that it is a scary step to take to go into counseling but it is a very healthy choice. Taking care of yourself mentally will help with all areas of your life. Counselors will want to help you with all aspects of your life. In order to do that, it is very helpful for clients to be honest with counselors, and your counselor will ...
Counseling Relationship
I think the most important thing in the counseling relationship is trust and energy.
It is not always necessary for you to like your counselor and the possibility of you disliking them after particular sessions is a possibility. I find that the important point for people to understand, when you are considering going into counseling, is that your counselor is not there boss you around, or to make your decisions, or to do all of the work. A counselor is most importantly to be a guide through an exploration of yourself. A counselor is meant to talk through your hardest and happiest times, and help you to understand things about yourself that maybe you hadn't seen before or that will make you want to love yourself the way you should.
The counseling experience may take a short or long time, be painful or stress relieving, but my counseling style is finding the balance that a client needs to succeed and prosper in all that they want to do. It's an amazing process if the client is willing to le...
My Work as a San Francisco Psychologist
My work as a psychologist began 27 years ago at Northern Illinois University, where I counseled students with various psychological and emotional difficulties. Later, I did similar work at the University of Illinois at Chicago, before moving to San Francisco to set up an independent practice as a clinical psychologist.
Shortly after moving to San Francisco, I developed an interest in Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) and Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD), conditions that are common among children and adolescents but also impact many adults.
Through coursework, study and clinical practice, I’ve become an expert in these two areas. As a child psychologist, I am also qualified to treat other conditions, such as childhood depression and anxiety, learning disabilities, anger, defiance, grief and loneliness.
My Work as an Autism Psychologist
I refer to myself as an autism psychologist because conditions that are included in the autism spectrum disorders (ASD) have been ...
How Long Does Therapy Take?
(From the Downtown Therapy blog. Check it out to see more)
When does it end?
It’s a good question, and there are a few reasons why this is raised:
◊ If you’ve never been in therapy before (i.e. you are starting from scratch and overwhelmed by all of the information you discover) it may be a source of comfort to look for structure; to see if there is a beginning, middle, and end to the process.
◊ Some modes of therapy advertise a structured course, a pre-set number of sessions. Their logic is that, say, after nine sessions, your issue will have been isolated and you will have been handed rational strategies for dealing with said issue. A problem with this approach is: what if that issue isn’t “it”? What if there’s more to it than the “it” you isolated? Also, what if you are suffering from something that doesn’t lend itself to rational strategies (grief for the loss of a loved one, for example)?
◊ You may thi...
Providing Hope in Recovery
Thanks to Grady Hospital for hosting an LPCA-sponsored free CE event on Severe & Persistent Mental Illness this past Friday. I was honored to co-present with Laila Muhanna, LAPC and graduate of Brenau University, who provided attendees with a model of recovery grounded in hope and focused on positive outcomes.
Health Fair
I was fortunate to have a table at yesterday's 3rd Annual Newburyport Health Fair. What a wonderful event. I felt like I was surrounded be positive and friendly people who, like myself, were there to spread health and happiness to our community. In addition to some literature, I had a Reiki table set up and offered free mini Reiki sessions. This was quite popular as I was by far the last person to leave the fair. I very much enjoyed the entire event for many reasons: I enjoy meeting new people; I love performing Reiki on people; I love helping people to get what they really want out of life-to be the type of person they REALLY want to be (Reiki and some redirecting helped); I love supporting my community; and most importantly, the feeling of being surrounded by people with a common cause, good mental and physical health!
Benefits of Group Therapy
How group therapy can help you improve with others:
Safety and comfort in commonality
Increased speed of healing breakthroughs
Support of othersInvolvement in positive change for others
Group counseling is a very powerful and effective way to engage in personal change. While some people are initially hesitant to share their struggles or concerns with a group of strangers, participants in group counseling soon understand that the group is intentionally set up so that all members of the group are accountable to being respectful and keeping all information confidential. This allows members to quickly become comfortable within the safety of the group, and therefore gain tremendous benefit from the support of not just a therapist but an entire group of people. Common benefits of group therapy include the speed with which breakthroughs and change can happen, the knowledge for each member that he/she is not alone in their struggles, the growth that comes from being able to receive support ...
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