How to Get Taken Seriously

By: Emily R. Keller 02/12/2013

I’ve noticed some trends among people who say, “I want to be taken seriously,” or ask, “How can I be taken seriously?” People who feel like they aren’t taken seriously typically:

    Are people pleasers

    Don’t hold firm boundaries

    Are not consistent

    Don’t speak up for themselves

    Don’t ask for what they want and need (and sometimes are not aware of what they want and need)

The steps, then, to being taken seriously are to:

    Take the time to think about and feel your wants and needs

    Ask for what you want and need

    Speak up and share your thoughts and opinions

    Be consistent (easier when you are speaking your truth, using your values to guide you, and listening to what you want and need)

    Draw boundaries according to what makes sense to you (Give yourself permission to say “no”)

    And be OK with the fact that some people are going to naturally be attracted to your truth and some people aren’t.

A colleague of mine mentioned a “Rule of Thirds.” One-third of people will automatically like you, 1/3 will learn to like you, and 1/3 never will like you no matter what you do. No matter how hard we try, it seems, we just can’t please everyone. We can, however tune in to our truth: our voice, intuition, experience of the world, wants and needs. And when we do that and let that guide us, we are taken seriously.

Being taken seriously doesn’t mean not having fun and enjoying life! It means you are in tune with your truth and let it guide you, and you therefore are authentic and consistent, which doesn’t exclude being spontaneous and laughing!

If you think that your tendency to put your own wants and needs behind others is causing problems in your life or relationship, consider calling to schedule a counseling appointment. You can find a way to consider yourself while in relationship.