Therapist Blog

My Friend Needs A Therapist - Will You Contact Them?

Short answer: I can’t.

Longer answer: this question has been asked many times and in various forms (exchange “friend” for “wife”, “husband”, “child”), and each time I’ve been unable to accommodate the request. Why? Part of seeing a therapist is the idea of will and choice – the will to investigate something which we feel is bothering us, and the choice of whom to see for this service. If I were to go ahead and contact someone at the behest of a friend or relative, I would be imposing myself upon that choice and that will (symbolically at least).

My Friend Needs A Therapist - Will You Contact Them?

Even if someone I contacted ended up never-minding my intrusion (and their friend’s intervention) and became a regular client, that initial lack of choice and will would probably linger in the therapeutic space. It could prove disruptive to the extreme, especially as they become more and more attuned to their situation.

So, no, sadly I cannot contact your friend, no matter how much they may need to talk to someone. That person needs to take the first step, because it’s a very important one.

(From the Downtown Therapy blog. Check it out to see more)