Child Or Adolescent Issues Category
Boosting Your Child's Self Esteem and Confidence
Boosting Your Kids' Self-Esteem and Confidence
Use the following tips to boost your child's self-esteem and confidence in healthy ways..Remember kids internalize who they are from the way adults, particularly parents, treat them.
- I listen to my kids and acknowledge their feelings.
- I understand that both my kids and I will make mistakes.
- I am not afraid to say "I'm sorry” when the mistake is mine.
- I am clear and consistent about discipline.
- I use "I" statements to express my thoughts and feelings.
- I avoid "you" statements that blame, shame, label, or ridicule my kids.
- I encourage my kids to be independent, but I make sure I'm available if they need me.
- I am teaching my kids valuable lessons such problem solving, communication, sharing and respect for themselves and others.
- I use the same good manners with my as kids that I would with an adult.
- I honor each of my kids’ unique abilities and personalities, allowing them to be different.
- My behavior with ...
Child Molester or Pedophile - Is there a difference and what drives them?
Sexual abuse of children is not a new problem, nor have the statistics changed. “1 in 4 girls is sexually abused before the age of 14; 1 in 6 boys is sexually abused before the age of 16.” (Hopper, J. (1998). Child Sexual Abuse: Statistics, Research, & Resources. Boston, MA Boston University School of Medicine.) This issue is as old as time, but we are finally paying attention to it in a new way. Whether it is in the church, sports, boys clubs, schools or families, there have always been environmental pockets in society that foster these deviants. Whether it is about sex or power, children have always been the most vulnerable segment of the population, and their rights need to be more conscientiously protected.
Pedophilia is a psychological disorder that is thought to be caused by a combination of genetic and environmental factors and may run in families. That latter fact may be the result of genetic defects or because pedophiles often were victims of sexual abuse them...
The Judge-Jester and the Little Boy
October 9, 2012
I walked into the courtroom and saw the judge dressed up like a jester. Hanging from the rafters were orange, yellow, and blue bunting. Balloons were everywhere. In the middle of the court room was a huge piñata. Over four feet, top to bottom, a deep ruby red. It was in the shape of a heart. Beside it was the most beautiful wooden gavel, two feet long with thin silver filigreed inlay. Around the judge-jester, on every side, amongst the balloons, looking up at the piñata...were hundreds of children dressed up like judges. The judge-jester raised his hand, and everyone, from toddlers to children who had just celebrated their tenth birthdays, were silent.
The judge-jester, a man in his sixties with freshly-scrubbed face, smelling a little like soap, a little like sweat, and a lot like amateur clown make-up, cleared his throat ceremoniously. The children became even more quiet. "In the past ten years, I have made the final decision as to where each o...
Deciding When to Seek Therapy for Your Child/Adolescent
Determining at what point one should seek treatment for their child or adolescent can be difficult. When a significant life event, such as the divorce of one’s parents, terminal diagnosis of a parent, significant trauma, or other serious event occurs, it is usually more evident that in many cases treatment may be warranted. In the above-mentioned situations, treatment can help your child cope with the change or impending change to their life. It can also have a good protective function in reducing the likelihood of your child or adolescent developing more significant problems later on.
However, when your child seems to be struggling with issues such as bullying, low self-esteem, significant difficulty managing anger, and other more common issues, the decision at which point to seek treatment becomes somewhat less clear.
In general, if you have significant concerns about your child’s or adolescent’s functioning, behavior, or mood, it is best to seek a consultation wi...
When Should You Have Your Child Evaluated for Learning Disabilities?
When Should You Have Your Child Evaluated for Learning Disabilities?
Determining when the appropriate time to have your child first evaluated is a difficult question to answer, and varies on a case-by-case basis based on individual factors. However, there are a few questions to ask yourself as well as basic information concerning the likely onset of learning disabilities that can help guide you in deciding whether or not to have your child evaluated.
Questions:
Has your child displayed academic and/or behavioral difficulties since they first began school?
Has your child just started struggling during the current academic year?
What factors have changed during the current academic year that could account for difficulties (i.e., new school, transition from elementary to middle school, significant increase in workload, etc.)?
Does your child fluctuate between periods of doing well and struggling considerably?
Answers:
If your child has displayed academic and/or behavioral difficulti...
Soul Rape
Soul rape is a silent assassin appearing to live inside human nature, unchallenged, it waits for death because there is no relief. The devil is a liar...... Whom The Son sets free is free, You are an overcomer. Stop hiding the pain so you can heal, you don't have to be afraid. The Lord is your Redeemer.
Tell somebody what happened no matter what the relationship was to you. IT WAS NOT YOUR FAULT. GOD HAS MADE A WAY OF ESCAPE.
My dear friend life will be filled with challenges that appear to be gaining ground, however no matter the ground that it appears to be gaining you must stay focused at all times.
Yes dissappointment will rear its head and disstraction will taunt you, this is not a phsycical fight to be won in the arena of gladiators. This war gauged in the psyche. With that being the case, you don't have to fight alone, because wars are not won single handedly, wars are won by those who have a team of experience at all levels of engagement.
So the warriors of change must be de...
GIRL BULLYING: WHAT CAN WE DO ABOUT IT?
As therapists we are used to working in the “shades of gray” but one thing we know is that boys and girls are different. When a parent comes to us it is vital that we understand the distinction between how boys and how girls bully each other.
Bullying is an issue that triggers emotional reactions in us because most of us have been bullied at some time. Girl bullying is an important segment of the larger issue of female self-esteem and female friendships.
When parents come with issues of bullying, this presents the opportunity for you to help parents, to not only navigate this difficult situation, but also to give them education and tools to strengthen their daughter’s sense of self. This will enable their daughters to grow into strong and confident young women.
Complicating this issue is that we are working with a generation of kids that are “digital natives” and use technology on a level that we will never fully understand. The anonymity and availabili...
Strengthening your Family
When we are in child-bearing years, we all dream of creating a “perfect” family. We often talk-about, analyze, and critique the many mistakes our parents made and determine that we won’t make the same mistakes. Twenty years later, we realize that, although we didn’t make the same mistakes, we made our own mistakes – some of those were made just in the process of avoiding our parent’s mistakes.
Parenting is hard (maybe impossible). Thankfully, most children are forgiving. Parenting does work; but it works because our children help us to make it work, not because we do it perfectly. Our children want good parenting and, if we listen to them, we can learn much from them about how to parent them.
The only reward we get from the years and work of parenting is a possible wonderful relationship with an adult child, their partner, and their children. Keep that in the forefront of your mind and try to not sacrifice this in your quest to raise your children....
Disorders that May Accompany ADHD
Children affected by Attention Deficit and Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) often have other conditions that make it hard for them to conduct themselves appropriately. Knowing whether such conditions exist and what they are is a critical piece in diagnosing and treating ADHD.
When it appears that two or more conditions might be operating alongside ADHD symptoms, a professional, such as an ADHD psychologist, will attempt to determine whether one primary condition can fully account for the symptoms. That condition would then become the focus of treatment.
For example, if a person has ADHD symptoms only during periods of depression, then ADHD would not be diagnosed and the person would be treated for depression. If both conditions contribute to the person’s difficulties, then both ADHD and the accompanying condition(s) should be treated.
Here are some disorders that often accompany ADHD:
Learning Disabilities
Approximately 20 to 30 percent of children with ADHD also have a specifi...
How to Help Children Cope with Grief
"There is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think." ~ Winnie the Pooh
Children and teenagers are not immune to facing loss, death and grief.
As much as we adults want to protect and shelter children and try to create a world for them in which loss does not occur, we cannot. Sorrow is part of life, for children as well as for adults. What we can do is teach children how to cope with these sorrows.
The following tips, gathered from my work as a child psychologist, will help parents, teachers, and other caregivers support children who have experienced significant loss.
Don’t assume that all children of the same age process loss in the same way. Children are different, just like adults, and they experience loss in different ways. Listen to the unique ways that children express grief and focus on their individual needs, not on how you think grief should be dealt with.
- Encourage children to ask quest...
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