After a life-changing event that is traumatic, how can you put yourself together again? How do you ever feel like you can make it again??? People tend to say, be positive, but how can you be positive when there is so much going on in ones life? It is easy to say that, right? How do we do it?
- Seek help; don’t retrieve to a dark, empty hole.
- Accept the event, don’t fight it or resist it. Acceptance is the beginning of healing. And remember it may take some time, that’s ok.
- Surround yourself by supportive people, events, and places.
- Watch, read, or listen to funny shows, stay away from dramatic, tear jerking programs (or songs).
- Do not listen to other people’s sad stories, that’s not going to get you out of your dark moment…be polite but assertive, say something like “this is not the best moment for me to hear this…” or “although I appreciate you trying to help…” And yes, people tend to tell you their horror stories when you are on you lowest of the low. Not their fault, they are just trying to relate, albeit being the wrong kind of help.
- Even if it is a little walk once a day.
- Take time for yourself. Do the things you may have left behind or been too busy to accomplish.
- Take on EASY tasks. Overwhelm is not going to help.
- Learn to transfer yourself from one emotional state to a better, more effective one.
- Be kind to yourself. Now you are ready to change your brain…thus, your life.
This is where professional help becomes imperative into your life. An investment in YOUR SELF is always a good investment. A therapist with a gestalt vision (an approach that looks at all aspects of you) will help to put all those pieces together. It is time that you take your life in your hands, be what you want, when you want. There is nothing more important than you. The more of a “giver” you are, the more important it is that you feel good about yourself and happy in your life, thus you will be able to keep giving.
Lola Gascon, LMHC