Online Self Esteem therapists in Selsey, England ENG, United Kingdom UK

Low self-worth is often experienced as a belief - something to be challenged, reframed, or worked on. In practice, it tends to live deeper than that: in the body's habitual posture, in the contraction that happens before speaking in a group, in the felt sense of taking up too much or too little space. This work reaches those layers and creates the conditions for a different experience of yourself to emerge - not as an idea, but as something your body actually registers as true.  

Find your inner self worth as you address and heal from the underlying burdens contributing to low self esteem.  

Low self-esteem can impact every part of your life your relationships, decisions, confidence, and sense of identity. If you often feel “not enough,” doubt yourself, or struggle to trust your inner voice, you’re not alone. I offer a supportive, compassionate space to understand the roots of these feelings, heal old beliefs, and rebuild a stronger, more confident sense of self. Together, we work towards helping you reconnect with your strengths, value, and inner resilience.  

Lack of Confidence and Self esteem and cane debilitating, I will help you to see those parts of you that are great, and become more confident  

Self esteem can be said to be an individual's subjective evaluation of their own self-worth, based on opinions and beliefs of self. When a sense of low self esteem affects one's daily life, it can cause one to see self in a negative and critical light, reinforcing underlying doubts and fears and can eventually lead to depression and anxiety.  

Low self esteem can be paralysing and can lead to other issues. however it does not need to be this way. I use both my personal and professional experience to help clients find rediscover themselves and thrive in life. I use both counselling and coaching skills to support clients on their journey.  

I hear the struggle you're facing with self-doubt and its impact on your life. It's heartbreaking to feel like you're not reaching your full potential due to a lack of self-confidence. This can affect every area of your life, from personal relationships to professional achievements and social interactions. It's common to feel like you're stuck in a cycle of self-doubt, where negative self-talk and fear of failure hold you back. But know that you're not alone in this feeling. Many people face similar challenges, and there is hope for change. Here are some ways we can work together to help you break free from these limitations: Identify and Challenge Negative Self-Talk: We can explore the roots of your self-doubt and develop strategies to replace negative thoughts with positive affirmations. Build Self-Confidence: By focusing on your strengths and past successes, we can build a stronger sense of self-worth. Set and Achieve Goals: Together, we can set realistic goals in your personal, work, and social life, and work on strategies to achieve them. Develop Healthy Relationships: We can explore ways to communicate your needs effectively and build more fulfilling relationships. Remember, seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness. You deserve to live a life where you feel confident and empowered to reach your full potential. Contact me today, and let's start this journey together. I'm here to support you every step of the way.  

We all relate to ourselves in varied and sometimes fluctuating ways - sometimes critically and harshly, other times in more gente and forgiving ways. This relationship is influenced by past and current experiences and what we have 'taken in' from those (especially with caregivers and other important people in our lives). A punitive, demeaning stance to one's own self, which has been there for a long time and is hard to shift, is what brings many people to therapy. Both because of the suffering it inflicts internally, as well as the impact it has on the way a person relates to the external world. If this is something you struggle with and would like to explore the option of psychotherapy to address this, please get in touch.  

How Therapy Can Help with Self-Esteem - The way you see yourself shapes everything—your relationships, your career choices, how you handle challenges, and even your overall happiness. If you struggle with low self-esteem, you're likely your own harshest critic, and that internal voice can be exhausting and limiting. The good news is that self-esteem isn't fixed—it can grow and strengthen with the right support, and therapy offers a powerful path toward seeing yourself more clearly and compassionately. What Low Self-Esteem Looks Like Low self-esteem goes beyond occasional self-doubt. It's a persistent negative view of yourself that might show up as: Constant self-criticism or negative self-talk Feeling like you're not good enough, no matter what you achieve Difficulty accepting compliments or believing positive feedback Comparing yourself unfavorably to others Perfectionism and fear of failure People-pleasing and difficulty saying no Avoiding challenges because you assume you'll fail Staying in unhealthy relationships because you don't think you deserve better Feeling like an imposter in your own life Apologizing excessively or taking blame for things that aren't your fault Difficulty making decisions because you don't trust yourself These patterns can hold you back from pursuing opportunities, building healthy relationships, and living authentically. How Therapy Helps Uncovering the Roots Low self-esteem doesn't appear out of nowhere—it's usually built over time through experiences like childhood criticism, emotional neglect, bullying, trauma, failed relationships, or repeated disappointments. Therapy helps you understand where your negative self-view originated. This isn't about blaming others; it's about recognizing that your inner critic was learned, which means it can be unlearned. Challenging the Inner Critic That harsh voice in your head isn't telling you the truth—it's repeating old messages that may have never been accurate in the first place. Therapy, particularly Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), helps you identify these negative thought patterns and challenge them with evidence and compassion. You learn to question thoughts like "I'm worthless" or "I always mess things up" and replace them with more balanced, realistic perspectives. Separating Your Worth from Your Performance Many people tie their self-esteem to achievements, appearance, or others' approval. Therapy helps you recognize that your worth is inherent—it doesn't depend on what you do, how you look, or what others think of you. This shift from conditional to unconditional self-worth is transformative and freeing. Processing Past Wounds If your low self-esteem stems from trauma, abuse, or painful experiences, therapies like EMDR can help process these memories so they have less emotional power over you. When you heal the wounds that taught you to see yourself negatively, your self-esteem naturally begins to improve. Developing Self-Compassion Self-compassion is treating yourself with the same kindness you'd offer a good friend. Therapy helps you cultivate this gentler internal voice, recognizing that everyone makes mistakes, has flaws, and struggles sometimes—and that doesn't make you less worthy. You learn to comfort yourself rather than attack yourself when things go wrong. Identifying Your Strengths and Values Low self-esteem often creates tunnel vision where you only see your perceived flaws and failures. Therapy helps you take a more balanced inventory—recognizing your strengths, accomplishments, positive qualities, and the values that guide you. Many people are genuinely surprised to discover how much they've been discounting about themselves. Setting Healthy Boundaries When you don't value yourself, you're more likely to let others mistreat you, overextend yourself, or stay in situations that diminish you. Therapy helps you recognize that you deserve respect and teaches you how to set boundaries that protect your wellbeing. Each time you honor a boundary, you reinforce your own worth. Building Assertiveness Learning to express your needs, opinions, and feelings without excessive fear or guilt is crucial for healthy self-esteem. Therapy provides a safe space to practice assertiveness and develop confidence in your right to take up space, have needs, and be heard. Breaking People-Pleasing Patterns If you've learned to derive worth from making others happy or avoiding conflict, therapy helps you examine this pattern and gradually shift toward living more authentically. You learn that disappointing someone occasionally doesn't make you a bad person, and that your needs matter just as much as anyone else's. Celebrating Progress, Not Just Perfection Therapy helps you recognize and celebrate small wins and efforts, not just major achievements. You learn to acknowledge growth, courage, and trying—even when things don't turn out perfectly. This builds a more sustainable, realistic foundation for self-esteem. Experiencing Unconditional Acceptance Perhaps one of the most healing aspects of therapy is experiencing genuine acceptance from your therapist. In person-centred therapy especially, you're met with unconditional positive regard—you're valued simply for being you, not for what you accomplish or how you perform. This experience can begin to rewire your belief about your own worthiness. Types of Therapy That Help Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT): Directly targets negative thought patterns and helps you develop more balanced thinking about yourself. Person-Centred Therapy: Offers unconditional acceptance that helps you internalize a more positive self-view. EMDR: Processes traumatic experiences that damaged your self-esteem. Compassion-Focused Therapy (CFT): Specifically designed to build self-compassion and counter self-criticism. Psychodynamic Therapy: Explores how early relationships and experiences shaped your self-concept. Group Therapy: Provides connection with others who struggle similarly and offers opportunities to receive positive feedback and support. What Growth Looks Like As therapy progresses and your self-esteem strengthens, you might notice: Quieter, kinder internal dialogue More willingness to try new things or take healthy risks Ability to accept compliments and believe them Setting and maintaining boundaries without excessive guilt Making decisions with more confidence Less comparison to others Greater resilience when things go wrong Choosing relationships and situations that honor your worth Feeling more comfortable being yourself.  

I help clients rebuild their sense of self-worth from the inside out. Together, we explore the roots of self-doubt, shift internal narratives, and develop a more grounded, confident relationship with yourself.  

Low self-esteem can shape how you see yourself, what you expect from relationships, what you tolerate, and what you believe you deserve. It often develops through repeated experiences of criticism, neglect, rejection, comparison, shame, or feeling unseen. My approach is warm, reflective, and focused on helping you understand the deeper roots of how you came to relate to yourself in this way, so that you can build greater self-worth, self-trust, and confidence.  

This is one of the main areas where people come to work with me. Often, they know they feel unhappy and even feel lost. It could be that things have not been great in your life and you are surprised by how quickly and utterly this has knocked you down. Working on self esteem and finding that deep appreciation and concern for who you actually are, can transform your life. I would love to be part of this journey with you, so please get in touch.  

Self-Esteem & Self-Confidence - Complimentary Consultation Are you struggling with low self-esteem or a critical inner voice? Many people carry self-doubt that affects their relationships, decisions and ability to pursue opportunities with confidence. Through coaching, we work on developing greater self-awareness, self-acceptance and self-compassion while strengthening a healthier and more stable sense of self. The goal is to help you build confidence that is grounded, realistic and supportive of the life you want to create. Book a complimentary consultation to explore whether this approach is right for you.  

Self-esteem is often shaped by the ways we have learned to adapt in order to feel safe, accepted, or valued. Through a trauma-informed lens and a focus on trauma endurance, I support clients in understanding these patterns and developing a more grounded, authentic sense of self that is not solely defined by past experiences.  

Low self-esteem isn't about lacking confidence. It's about carrying a deep sense that something's fundamentally wrong with you. You might be good at your job, have people who love you, tick all the boxes—but inside, you're convinced you're not enough. That if people really knew you, they'd see through the performance. This feeling didn't come from nowhere. Somewhere along the line, you learned that who you are isn't acceptable. Maybe you were criticized, dismissed, or had to earn approval that should have been freely given. Your nervous system learned: "I have to be perfect/invisible/useful to be okay." We work to understand where that belief got installed and why it's still running. Not through affirmations or telling you you're great—that doesn't work because you won't believe it. Instead, we look at what happened that taught you to see yourself this way, and then we start dismantling it. Real self-worth isn't built through positive thinking. It's built through understanding why you learned to reject yourself, then slowly learning you don't have to anymore.  

Self-esteem is a complex concept that includes how you feel about yourself, your self-worth, how capable you are (self-efficacy) and self-confidence. If you have low self-esteem, chances are you have struggled in relationships, have experienced domestic abuse, or have internalised hurtful comments from other people. Perhaps you are judgmental and critical of yourself. Therapy can help work through your difficult feelings, reconnect to yourself, regain your confidence and learn relationship and other skills to help in the future.  

I work with clients regarding building self esteem both in a person centred way, feeling heard and validated, as well as at times using CBT in order to reframe thoughts in order to change feelings and work towards more empowering behaviours. These behaviours in turn encourage more supportive and compassionate self talk which enables the client to feel better about themselves.  

Paul Shepard wrote; “The grief and sense of loss that we often attribute to a failure in our personality, is actually a feeling of emptiness where a beautiful and strange otherness should have been encountered.” Ecotherapy and contact with nature aims to fill the void.  

I am a Psycho-Spiritual Counsellor offering bespoke services using a combination of holistic and complementary intervention to help promote your sense of Self as an individual being. I work with your beliefs and mindsets, and the perception of your worth.  

Self-esteem for success is our motto. We have a dedicated program to help develop and boost healthy self-esteem. Contact us today to get started.