You have been trying. Not occasionally, not when it is convenient — constantly, at real cost, for a long time. And now someone close to you is telling you that how you are is the problem. How you act. How you see things. And to you, those are not separate from who you are — they are who you are. You do not perform yourself. You show up as yourself, fully, every time. So what is being called a problem does not feel like feedback about a behaviour. It feels like a verdict on your person.
You are not without fault, and you know it. You are not claiming to be easy or uncomplicated. But your intentions have been real, your effort has been genuine, and neither of those things seems to be landing. You accommodate where you can. But there is a line, and you will not cross it, because on the other side of that line you stop being you. And whatever else you are willing to give, that is not available.
What has kept you here — the way you are built, the way you hold yourself together — it has worked. It has carried you through things that required carrying. The weariness you feel is not weakness. It is the accumulated cost of a resilience that is real. But it has also cost you. And the world you want to be part of — the connection you want, the life on the other side of this struggle — you cannot quite get there on your own. Not because something is wrong with you. Because what got you this far was built for survival, and surviving and belonging are not the same thing.
If you are willing, I would like to work with you on this.