Online Self Esteem therapists in Stanley, England ENG, United Kingdom UK

At the core of it, no one should be able to talk you into or out of self esteem. We help you to earn this respect from and by yourself.  

Low self-esteem often isn’t a lack of ability—it’s a learned relationship with yourself shaped by old experiences, chronic self-criticism, comparison, or the feeling of “not enough.” For many high-functioning people, it can also show up as imposter feelings: the sense that success isn’t truly deserved or that you could be “found out” at any moment. Many people cope by overachieving, people-pleasing, perfectionism, or shrinking their needs to avoid judgment. In our work together, we identify the beliefs and protective strategies underneath self-doubt and build a steadier form of self-trust. That includes strengthening boundaries, practicing more honest self-talk, working with shame and fear of evaluation, and learning how to take meaningful action even when confidence isn’t fully online. Often, confidence returns as self-trust strengthens. The goal isn’t inflated confidence, but a grounded sense of worth—so you can show up in relationships and in life with greater clarity and a stronger sense of agency and freedom.  

I think it is helpful to work on an individuals relationship to the self and how one can have misconceptions about how you are seen in the world and how to develop a better appreciation and understanding of the self. If you feel rejected or marginalized by society do you continue to put yourself down or do we learn how to engage in a different kinder relationship with the self? This is the premise that I try to develop in my work.  

How Therapy Can Help with Self-Esteem - The way you see yourself shapes everything—your relationships, your career choices, how you handle challenges, and even your overall happiness. If you struggle with low self-esteem, you're likely your own harshest critic, and that internal voice can be exhausting and limiting. The good news is that self-esteem isn't fixed—it can grow and strengthen with the right support, and therapy offers a powerful path toward seeing yourself more clearly and compassionately. What Low Self-Esteem Looks Like Low self-esteem goes beyond occasional self-doubt. It's a persistent negative view of yourself that might show up as: Constant self-criticism or negative self-talk Feeling like you're not good enough, no matter what you achieve Difficulty accepting compliments or believing positive feedback Comparing yourself unfavorably to others Perfectionism and fear of failure People-pleasing and difficulty saying no Avoiding challenges because you assume you'll fail Staying in unhealthy relationships because you don't think you deserve better Feeling like an imposter in your own life Apologizing excessively or taking blame for things that aren't your fault Difficulty making decisions because you don't trust yourself These patterns can hold you back from pursuing opportunities, building healthy relationships, and living authentically. How Therapy Helps Uncovering the Roots Low self-esteem doesn't appear out of nowhere—it's usually built over time through experiences like childhood criticism, emotional neglect, bullying, trauma, failed relationships, or repeated disappointments. Therapy helps you understand where your negative self-view originated. This isn't about blaming others; it's about recognizing that your inner critic was learned, which means it can be unlearned. Challenging the Inner Critic That harsh voice in your head isn't telling you the truth—it's repeating old messages that may have never been accurate in the first place. Therapy, particularly Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), helps you identify these negative thought patterns and challenge them with evidence and compassion. You learn to question thoughts like "I'm worthless" or "I always mess things up" and replace them with more balanced, realistic perspectives. Separating Your Worth from Your Performance Many people tie their self-esteem to achievements, appearance, or others' approval. Therapy helps you recognize that your worth is inherent—it doesn't depend on what you do, how you look, or what others think of you. This shift from conditional to unconditional self-worth is transformative and freeing. Processing Past Wounds If your low self-esteem stems from trauma, abuse, or painful experiences, therapies like EMDR can help process these memories so they have less emotional power over you. When you heal the wounds that taught you to see yourself negatively, your self-esteem naturally begins to improve. Developing Self-Compassion Self-compassion is treating yourself with the same kindness you'd offer a good friend. Therapy helps you cultivate this gentler internal voice, recognizing that everyone makes mistakes, has flaws, and struggles sometimes—and that doesn't make you less worthy. You learn to comfort yourself rather than attack yourself when things go wrong. Identifying Your Strengths and Values Low self-esteem often creates tunnel vision where you only see your perceived flaws and failures. Therapy helps you take a more balanced inventory—recognizing your strengths, accomplishments, positive qualities, and the values that guide you. Many people are genuinely surprised to discover how much they've been discounting about themselves. Setting Healthy Boundaries When you don't value yourself, you're more likely to let others mistreat you, overextend yourself, or stay in situations that diminish you. Therapy helps you recognize that you deserve respect and teaches you how to set boundaries that protect your wellbeing. Each time you honor a boundary, you reinforce your own worth. Building Assertiveness Learning to express your needs, opinions, and feelings without excessive fear or guilt is crucial for healthy self-esteem. Therapy provides a safe space to practice assertiveness and develop confidence in your right to take up space, have needs, and be heard. Breaking People-Pleasing Patterns If you've learned to derive worth from making others happy or avoiding conflict, therapy helps you examine this pattern and gradually shift toward living more authentically. You learn that disappointing someone occasionally doesn't make you a bad person, and that your needs matter just as much as anyone else's. Celebrating Progress, Not Just Perfection Therapy helps you recognize and celebrate small wins and efforts, not just major achievements. You learn to acknowledge growth, courage, and trying—even when things don't turn out perfectly. This builds a more sustainable, realistic foundation for self-esteem. Experiencing Unconditional Acceptance Perhaps one of the most healing aspects of therapy is experiencing genuine acceptance from your therapist. In person-centred therapy especially, you're met with unconditional positive regard—you're valued simply for being you, not for what you accomplish or how you perform. This experience can begin to rewire your belief about your own worthiness. Types of Therapy That Help Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT): Directly targets negative thought patterns and helps you develop more balanced thinking about yourself. Person-Centred Therapy: Offers unconditional acceptance that helps you internalize a more positive self-view. EMDR: Processes traumatic experiences that damaged your self-esteem. Compassion-Focused Therapy (CFT): Specifically designed to build self-compassion and counter self-criticism. Psychodynamic Therapy: Explores how early relationships and experiences shaped your self-concept. Group Therapy: Provides connection with others who struggle similarly and offers opportunities to receive positive feedback and support. What Growth Looks Like As therapy progresses and your self-esteem strengthens, you might notice: Quieter, kinder internal dialogue More willingness to try new things or take healthy risks Ability to accept compliments and believe them Setting and maintaining boundaries without excessive guilt Making decisions with more confidence Less comparison to others Greater resilience when things go wrong Choosing relationships and situations that honor your worth Feeling more comfortable being yourself.  

We will focus on acceptance of self and past  

In modern life, we often feel that self-esteem is something that comes from our achievements, successes and how we are perceived by others. We often fall into the trap of believing that other people are the cause of our low self-esteem. However, self-esteem flows from the inside-out. What this means is that as we get back in touch with who we really are and allow ourselves to flow from that space our self-esteem naturally begins to increase.  

Low self-worth is often experienced as a belief - something to be challenged, reframed, or worked on. In practice, it tends to live deeper than that: in the body's habitual posture, in the contraction that happens before speaking in a group, in the felt sense of taking up too much or too little space. This work reaches those layers and creates the conditions for a different experience of yourself to emerge - not as an idea, but as something your body actually registers as true.  

When things go wrong, it’s easy to blame yourself. With compassionate guidance, we’ll explore self-acceptance and honesty, helping you rebuild confidence and self-worth at your own pace.  

I work with clients to help them build true confidence. This means developing a healthy relationship with themselves that includes learning about self love, self acceptance, acceptance of others, setting boundaries, compassion and living consciously.  

Our sense of ourselves greatly impacts how we interact in the world and the type of experiences we have. Our views on ourselves does not have to be set in stone though and is something that can be continually improved and worked upon allowing us to begin to engage in the world in a much more satisfying and enjoyable way  

Self-esteem is often shaped by the ways we have learned to adapt in order to feel safe, accepted, or valued. Through a trauma-informed lens and a focus on trauma endurance, I support clients in understanding these patterns and developing a more grounded, authentic sense of self that is not solely defined by past experiences.  

When you have low self-esteem you can feel unloved, worthless, lack confidence and think negatively about yourself. Counselling is a supportive process which can help you to explore the way you feel, get to the root of what has happened for you and can help you grow and build a healthy sense of self-esteem and confidence.  

We have been working with clients to increase and improve their confidence and self-esteem with hypnotherapy and mindfulness therapies since 2007. We can help you escape negative thoughts, feelings and experiences, allowing you to love, appreciate and accept yourself more fully.  

Self esteem can be said to be an individual's subjective evaluation of their own self-worth, based on opinions and beliefs of self. When a sense of low self esteem affects one's daily life, it can cause one to see self in a negative and critical light, reinforcing underlying doubts and fears and can eventually lead to depression and anxiety.  

You are not your inner critic. Together, we’ll explore the unconscious beliefs shaping how you see yourself and shift them from the root. You deserve to feel confident in who you are, not just on the surface, but deep within. Let’s start building that foundation today.  

My holistic, relational approach to therapy helps women to identify negative or limiting self-beliefs about themselves in a safe, non-judgemental space. This involves parts-work where individuals develop the capability to embrace and integrate all parts of self - helping to move from self-criticism and aversion; to self-compassion and acceptance. This restored sense of awareness and wholeness awakens the calm, clarity and confidence that is already within and awaits you.  

I hear the struggle you're facing with self-doubt and its impact on your life. It's heartbreaking to feel like you're not reaching your full potential due to a lack of self-confidence. This can affect every area of your life, from personal relationships to professional achievements and social interactions. It's common to feel like you're stuck in a cycle of self-doubt, where negative self-talk and fear of failure hold you back. But know that you're not alone in this feeling. Many people face similar challenges, and there is hope for change. Here are some ways we can work together to help you break free from these limitations: Identify and Challenge Negative Self-Talk: We can explore the roots of your self-doubt and develop strategies to replace negative thoughts with positive affirmations. Build Self-Confidence: By focusing on your strengths and past successes, we can build a stronger sense of self-worth. Set and Achieve Goals: Together, we can set realistic goals in your personal, work, and social life, and work on strategies to achieve them. Develop Healthy Relationships: We can explore ways to communicate your needs effectively and build more fulfilling relationships. Remember, seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness. You deserve to live a life where you feel confident and empowered to reach your full potential. Contact me today, and let's start this journey together. I'm here to support you every step of the way.  

Lack of Confidence and Self esteem and cane debilitating, I will help you to see those parts of you that are great, and become more confident  

We all relate to ourselves in varied and sometimes fluctuating ways - sometimes critically and harshly, other times in more gente and forgiving ways. This relationship is influenced by past and current experiences and what we have 'taken in' from those (especially with caregivers and other important people in our lives). A punitive, demeaning stance to one's own self, which has been there for a long time and is hard to shift, is what brings many people to therapy. Both because of the suffering it inflicts internally, as well as the impact it has on the way a person relates to the external world. If this is something you struggle with and would like to explore the option of psychotherapy to address this, please get in touch.  

Paul Shepard wrote; “The grief and sense of loss that we often attribute to a failure in our personality, is actually a feeling of emptiness where a beautiful and strange otherness should have been encountered.” Ecotherapy and contact with nature aims to fill the void.