In recent times, the concept of attending to one’s inner child to heal oneself has been gaining popularity in psychotherapy. Therapeutic approaches such as the Internal Family System (IFS) and Parts Work, as well as various books and worksheets, have emphasized the importance of understanding one’s fragmented self and piecing it together like a puzzle to live a more wholesome and present life.
Janina Fisher, a renowned clinician, has described the awareness and attention to one’s fragmentation resulting from trauma as an integral part of understanding one’s personality and behaviour. By gaining insight into ourselves, we can heal and protect ourselves against negative emotions such as guilt, shame, or self-blame.
Connecting our adult selves with our younger selves deepens our sense of inner curiosity. We become more open to empathy and mindfulness, observing our experiences rather than being consumed by them. Inner-child work provides a path to the self that is less resistant to change by igniting a mammalian response within us, which is associated with empathy and nurturance. This response activates neural pathways that motivate us to bond and protect.
Individuals who have experienced trauma tend to experience more negative emotions and toxic self-criticism as a coping strategy. This approach creates a false sense of control over the situation they endured, making them feel safer in the future. However, this approach keeps them disconnected from themselves, limiting their thinking and leading to internalized blame.
While cognitive and behavioural approaches like Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) and Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) effectively address negative thought and behaviour patterns, connecting with our most vulnerable part—the inner child—is crucial for building self-compassion, a key factor in trauma recovery. Working with our inner child helps us tap into our empathy and nurturance, promoting healing and allowing us to live a more wholesome life with a profound new connection to our experiences and ourselves.
Fisher, J. (2017). Healing the fragmented selves of trauma survivors overcoming internal self-alienation. Taylor and Francis.
Rilling, J. K., & Young, L. J. (2014, August 15). Review the biologyof mammalian parenting and its EFFECTON … – miami. University of Miami: Department of Psychiatry. https://local.psy.miami.edu/faculty/dmessinger/c_c/rsrcs/rdgs/emot/rilling.science.mamallian.parenting.2014.pdf