There is an old native American legend concerning the “Two-Faced Monster”. Here it is: Two-Face is a malevolent humanoid monster of the Plains Indian tribes. In some tribes Two-Faces are described as ogres, but most often the Two-Face resembles a human except for having a second face on the back side of his or her…
The ideal woman for many men comes straight out of a codependent checklist. Many women are taught from an early age that they have to be a certain “way” around men. I have often dealt with women who are involved with abusive, emotionally distant men and cannot see that this is not functional for them.…
Today we meet R. An elderly woman who has been married for 40 years to an emotionally distant husband in a very dysfunctional relationship. The physical side of their relationship is non-existent and things at home are complicated by the fact that their 35-year-old son still lives at home. Her husband tries to spend as little…
Welcome to the second day of the Codependent Stories. M is a fictional character based on my client’s experiences. All events depicted here actually happened in someone’s life (or a group of people) in the last week. Permission was sought to use life events but no names have been revealed…… I have been offering online therapy for over 10…
B is a fictional character based my client’s experiences. All events depicted here actually happened in someone’s life (or a group of people) in the last week. Permission was sought to use life events but no names have been revealed…… I have been offering online therapy for over 10 years. During that time, I have built up…
These days we throw the words “narcissist” and “codependent” around like confetti. It is easy to label someone who appears self-centered as the former and one who gives a little bit too much as the latter. Despite the fact that we can easily recognise these traits in people, it is always dangerous to label people…
By Benjamin Marr, M.A., M.B.C. Dedication I dedicate this article to my mother, who always encouraged me to use my assets, although they had their limitations due to my disabilities. She motivated me to use my remaining skills to develop my intellect to an even higher level, never to perceive myself as handicapped (“cap-in-hand”), but…
Can you imagine being locked away with another person for a number of years, isolated from the outside world and seemingly helpless to escape? In the above example, a narcissist would be telling the codependent they are safe with them while trying to find an escape route for themselves! A codependent would be enabling the…
I believe firmly that it is only a matter of time before codependency becomes a recognised disorder. As discussed many times by this author, I have been challenged on occasions to prove that codependency truly exists and is not just a symptom of another disorder. The many clients I have who show similar debilitating symptoms…
Think about the following situations and the resulting behaviour : A text message from your partner’s former lover sends you into a spiral of rage, insecurity and self-doubt. They reassure you but you are convinced they are cheating. You want to change your job but fail to apply for a new one because you are convinced…